just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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