I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Randomize
