Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
