So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
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