Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Lo siento on account of my penis...
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