Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
Randomize
