I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
