I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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