We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
