Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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