1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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