And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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