Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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