My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
