His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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