no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
there is glitter all over my balls
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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