How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize
