I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
