Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
