I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
