No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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