Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
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