You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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