and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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