i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Too much gin, very little bucket
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize
