Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
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