I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
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