Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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