I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
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