Having a random hookup so left but love u
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
