so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Enjoy the penises
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Randomize
