i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
