Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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