Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I am mentally ready for anal.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Randomize