yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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