Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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