whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
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