I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
Randomize