OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
