Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
