Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
Randomize
