so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Randomize
