But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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