last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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