I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
