you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
