just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Randomize
