You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Randomize
