Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
I FOUND THE LEGS
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
