My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
His nipple licking is glorious
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