omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
how drunk are you?
Several
Randomize
